Monday, August 24, 2015
我不快乐
我不快乐 我真的好不快乐
以为2014很糟
但是原来
2015, 也并不是那么美好
LIFE, an age to the miserable, and a moment to the happy.
Miss my dad in a sudden... Because Mum just told me that she went to the Chinese temple and "visit" dad. Something like "invite" my dad to someone's body and the person will help to sound out what my daddy wants to tell. Hmm...
Dad said he's living good. He got the "money" that we burned. Good to know that, dad.
And dad said he will be more happy if bro can get married and got a baby. Oh...Dad wish to get a grandchild...
The problem is, dunnot when bro can get married lorh~ Even gf also havent got! And mum said "How about u get marry first?" Oh my God... she indirectly ask me to get married!
Mum... do u know ur daughter been single for few years and still searching for her Mr. Right? And yet no one want ur daughter lorh~ =P hahaha~
Time flies and I'm 24 yo now... really OMG. I think if I reach 35 yo I still haven't get a man, I will cincai find a man, as long as he is a MAN and I WILL JUST MARRY!!!
My blog has been dead for some time..... Opps, is that BUSY prob or LAZY prob? =P
Hmm... I've changed a new job from past 6 mths ago.. Working in a bank now and what I can say is... "NO LIFE". Y say so? Working hours from 8.45am until 8pm and jam jam jam until home I think is around 9pm. what?! so late huh?! YES, if its compare with my previous job.. But no choice, work for money. At least this job can fulfill what I want. Part of my dreams comes true. No doubt.. This job bring me a joyful life, And it did bring me a lovely boy too! =P Glad to blend in this working environment and knowing HIM. My B zai~ wahahaha
Been for Singapore for my second visit last week. Both 3 of us like big kids while we visited Universal Studios! Have lotsa fun there and we took lotsa photos =) A tired but memorable trip.
Back to reality, chasing SALES again~! Arghh.... Gotta force myself achieve the Million Dollar Club for 2nd time.. How am I going to do it...?? I need motivation!!! Dunno why.. my mindset just SO BLANK.. Everyday brining the dead body to work.. Like corpse.. lolz.
God.. Pls... Pls... Sales!!
Been dead for some time...
Now, should back on the track.
Yea he is NOTHING. Nothing than nothing.
真的很累。
一直反复问自己, 为什么我比其他人累?
看见其他人在无助的时候,身边都会有个人支持与鼓励,甚至可以解决金钱上的烦恼。
为什么我什么事都要自己解决?? 一个人去承担所有,很累。。。
要在我身边支持与鼓励我的人,其实不是没有,可是现在的我,真的没有心理准备要投入下一段感情。我想,我越来越不相信爱情了吧。。。
受伤的,总是我。唉。。
总有一天,我可以完全不需要靠任何一个人,都可以达成我的理想。
对,我要靠自己!!
只有这样,才能觉得自己是有用的。。。
至少,不需要看人家脸色,也是一件好事啊 = )
好吧。。加油吧柯卉。
重看了一篇自己的私人部落格。 眼泪不知不觉地掉了下来。
是感动? 是伤感? 还是讨厌这种感觉?
这种突然间一无所有的感觉。。。。
突然失去一个人。突然对人失去了信心,失去了信任。。。
话, 有多动听可以说得多动听。 但实际上呢? 做到吗?
做不到是其次,可是突然一走了之就是很不负责任!
对我,一点也不公平。
曾经,想要放弃的时候, 他挽留。
曾经,很相信他的每一句话。
曾经,在我说不要的事后,他哭着对我说不能不要。
曾经,被他感动得不顾一切地去爱。
最后呢? 离开的,还不一样是他。。。
早就知道这段感情不会有好结果,可是,我究竟在执着些什么呢?
生气,真的很生气。 始终有一天会分开,这,我了解。 以为奇迹会发生,可是,最后被选择的终究不是我。 我在乎的是,那个离开的原因。 能不能在一个明明白白的情况下,才分开? 他说,这是他欠我的。我知道,他只是不想说出那伤我的话。。或许,放弃我,比放弃其他的,还来得值得吧。
两个月前的我,真的接受不了那种从天堂跌入地狱的感受。那是我想象不到的。你走得好突然。
出现了,又离开了。留下了无数的问号,无奈。回去吧,继续你的生活,我不会再改变你了。
让他走吧。。。让他走回那原本就属于他的世界。
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